I Remember

I still remember the first time you said my name

Once when you were soft and well spoken
When you tried restlessly to control the quiver in your voice

You were always such a grand actor
And I the gullible child
Never did I doubt your words
Because you didn't give me reason to

I still remember as your eyes became wide
And a smile broke through your perfect lips
As though recognizing my existence
Made all the difference

I remember as I jumbled with words
Thoughts sped through my adrenaline filled heart

And you knew the effect you had on us
All much younger, and filled with such innocence
Such eagerness

And every move was filled with ulterior motives
As though you skin didn't ask
Didn't beg
To be touched ever so slightly

And you could read the lust in my thoughts
In my mind
And couldn't lie to say
That I wasn't oh so tempted

And I can still remember
The smirk between your lips
That's yelled
"Kiss me"

Real Vampires Don't Sparkle

My Version Of Twilight (Shorter, Yet More Interesting)
Bellas POV

So since I am sooo nice, unselfish and perfect let me move from my home in Phoenix, to Folks, some ugly, drizzly town with my dad just so my mom will be happy. Have I ever told you how much I hate my dad? Well, im not going to make any friends, because im freaky, ugly, and pale, and everyone in my old school hates me, and since im the pathetic main character I've gotta be an outcast, so this could be the perfect cliche story. So I move, and I have to take a super long plane ride, which I hate. Then my dad (which I hate) picks me up.
"Hey Charlie-dad" I say awkwardly.
"Oh hello Isabella" he replies, just as awkwardly.
"So what's up" I asked pointlessly, staring out the window to this place (which I hate) where I will need to live.
"I bought you a car, but it sucks, because I suck. And im lame" and we both know he isn't lying. Then I see my beaten up, huge fire engine red truck and since im so humble I instantly love it.
"Oh Charlie thank you" I say gratefully. Tomorrow I start school, in a new town, and im sure everyone is going to hate me because im pale, and everyone always hates the new girl.

So I couldn't sleep because of the rain, and I hate this place. Have I already said that? Well I get dressed, and go to school. I get my schedule, and everyones acting as though they've been expecting me since forever. I sit down in homeroom and some girl starts talking to me.
"Oh my god, Bella, you're soo pretty, and smart, and funny, and witty, I love you, lets be bestfriends" her name is Jessica. And yay ! I have a friend. I've never had a friend.
"Hey, Im Mike, will you go out with me" Jessica likes Mike, and im instantly cool, and popular, wow this is so much fun. And now im going to lunch with my new friends, because everyone likes me here. Then I see the most beautifully, perfectly, amazingly, awesomely, stunning person ever.
"Don't even look at him, that's Edward Cullen, he's too good for the girls here, he doesn't date" Jessica says, so he doesn't date? Is that the excuse all gay guys use now? So I have lunch, and the hot guy keeps staring, and I can't stop thinking about his hotness, and oh my god. He's sooo hot. So then lunch is over and I go to science, and sit down, and in walks in Mister. Hot guy, and oh my god, since this story is completely cliche' he sits next to me.
"Im Bella" I say, and he completely ignores me. And why is he ignoring me? Does he hate me? Oh my god, I haven't even talked to him and he hates me. Wow. But he's soo hot, oh my god, and his eyes, they are like liquid amber and topaz. Wow, Edward, I love him. This is love. Love love love. Edward Edward Edward. So then I spend all science staring at him, because he's sooo hot, and I love him but he hates me so let me mope around for a while. Then the bell rings and he disappears, where could he have gone. So for the next week I look for him but he's gone, and I can't find him.Gasp. What did I do? Why would he leave? Oh my god, what an asshole. He's sooo hot though. So then its a week later and im sitting science again, and I haven't seen the hot guys and in he walks. I had forgotten how hot he is, and gawd, he's soo hot, oh my god. And now his eyes are darker, gasp. Maybe he wears contacts.
"Hi Bella" he says and oh my god, I love it how he says my name. Its soo cute. Like he looks soo hot saying my name. Wow. I love him. And I cant breathe. And today we are watching a movie. He's soo moody, but its soo hot. I love him. And now the lights are off, and like wow, he's sooo hot. So then I spend all class pathetically staring at him. So he stands up and leaves and wow. He's soo hot. So then I go outside and its snowing, and im walking to my truck lalala, being an airhead. And gasp ! There's a truck coming right at me, and its skidding on the ice but im so pathetic that I can't save myself. And suddenly, I fall on the floor, and my head hits something cold. And gasp ! Im in Edwards arms, and he's dented the truck wow ! He saved me ! Oh my god, he's so hot ! I love him ! Gawd ! Edward !
"How'd you do that" I asked, since im sooo clueless to figure out the truth.
"Uh what" he said suspiciously. He's so cute when he acts suspicious, wow.
"You just like appeared here, and you were standing there, and like you dented the truck" I said with a gasp, and he rolled his eyes.
"Uh, Bella, you hit your head pretty hard there. Imma go call Carlisle" he stood and ran off, and I sighed, I was just saved by some really hot guy. Wow. He's sooo amazing. Gasp. I love him.

So now I was at the hospital though I was perfectly fine, Edward was avoiding me. Maybe he regretted saving me, but oh well, he's soo moody. But its hot. And then Charlie walks in being all worried .
"Dad, will you stop being soo uncool and leave" I whined, because that's all I do all story long.
"Bella, your friends are here" he said. So I stand up, and go outside, to find all Forks high school sitting outside, waiting for me. Gasp. I hate all the attention. I mean im new and everyone is in love with me already. Wow. This is sooo embarrassing. Edward isn't here, gasp, where's Edward !
A/n: this will be a shortish series retelling the twilight story. My version. I read the books and all so chill. This is a joke, so cut the PMSing shit.
(:

Two Lines

I want to write something out of these...

I just don't seem to have the time

Every moment of time tends to be metaphorical
Every second a lost lie in a crowded avenue

<3

A Thousand Broken Dreams

She woke up, panting again, breathing to steady her own betraying body. So it was a lie, a dream, I wasn't there,and neither was he, she tried smiling in relief, but it was a pathetic attempt. She decided she needed a drink, stood and realized she had severe cashes down each of her thighs, as though someone clawed through her fragile pale skin.
"No, no, no,no, no" she stumbled back, trying to escape whatever monsters were that she pictured. She ran her fingers over the cuts on her small legs, wiping some of the remaining blood off. She dragged herself into her younger sister Melanie's room, where the child laid unperturbed.
"Meli, can I sleep with you" she asked her younger sister, who groaned, and rolled over in response. The other girl slid into the bed, wrapping the covers over both her and her younger sister. She quicky drifted off to sleep.
"How could you" it was her mothers voice which first pulled her out of the darkness of her nights. She shifted.
"How could you" the yell came again, ofrcing her to open her eyes. In her arms laid the body of her younger sister, cuts running down her neck and to her stomach, neat lines on each of her thights, and several small cuts on her face. A knife in her hand, blood all over the both of them. She looked down, dropping the knife on the floor, the clatter echoing across the room. When had all this happened?

At This Particular Moment

My name is Carolyn Nicole...
Im better known as Caro.

I am childish, imaginitive, and highly opinionated.
I am an atheist.
I am obnoxiously honest.
I haven't and do not want to see twilight.
I talk with people in my head.
I am bad at saving money.
I am in love with pineapples and strawberry flavoed ice cream.
I only like pink starburst.
I always manage my hair.
I have a purple ipod.
I stole the title for my blog from PlayRadioPlay, an amazing band.
I love a man named William Beckett.
I adore songs with long titles.
I hate convinient people.
I overthink things.
I believe there's no such thing as love
I can be stuck up or come out as self centered.
I am brutally sarcastic.
And I am slightly obsessive.

I made this blog for very strict purposes, for my stories.

Not fan fiction about famous faces. (unofficialwilliambeckettobsessions.blogspot.com) or (insomethings.blogspot.com)
And definetely not for my random rnats (CaroGoesEmFingRawr.blogspot.com)

Welcome to the new story of my life.